Modern Star Trek’s So Ugly It Makes The Writing Look Good

Written by Chris Snellgrove | Published 6 seconds ago

When long-time fans complain about NuTrek, they usually focus on the writing, which is understandable; After all, you can’t hear too much Zoomer-induced slang before asking why characters hundreds of years in the future look like today’s free-spirited teenagers and not, you know, competent Starfleet officers. However, the biggest problem facing the series today has nothing to do with the writing or even the acting.

The worst thing about modern Star Trek is that it has become so relentless ugly. Despite spending more than eight million dollars For each episodeThe uniforms, ships and outer space visual effects are worst In over 60 years of franchise history. If you doubt it, don’t worry: like a good Ferengi, I have all the receipts!

Credit where credit is due

Let’s start with the uniforms, and in the spirit of fairness, let’s start with what has already worked well. Uniform in Strange new worlds It looks great, although that was always a given; One of the goals of the show has always been to modernize and modernize the aesthetic Star Trek: The Original Series. The uniforms of this former 1960s show are still absolutely present creativeand northwest They simply updated their look, giving us something akin to the Kelvinverse: a gorgeous redesign of the most timeless uniform in the entire franchise.

This might be interesting, but I really liked the uniforms in the first two seasons Star Trek: Discovery. They looked like sleek, modern versions of the blue team jackets worn by Captain Pike and Spock in the beginning Star Trek: The Original Series Pilot episode.

Additionally, it fits into existing lore better than most fans think: there have been weird uniform variations in this franchise since the beginning (such as different insignia for different ships and varied uniforms for different specialties), and the Golden Age of Journey has consistently featured characters using different styles of uniforms (such as a mix of TNG and DS9 Designs in Generations).

Keep in mind that Discovery was an experimental ship apparently powered by Section 31, and having these characters get a snazzy blue uniform makes perfect sense. However, the crew abandoned this murderous outlook once they moved to the 32nd Century. Instead, they adopted entirely new costumes that had one major problem: they were downright ugly, leading to a decline in Star Trek aesthetics that continues to this day.

It’s about to get ugly

In season 3 of Star Trek: Discoveryour favorite characters are getting new uniforms that look like a serious downgrade: those pretty blue uniforms are replaced by soulless gray uniforms whose dreariness can only be broken by a colorful dividing bar. The characters seemed softer than ever, and it didn’t help that this season’s story was less serious than Season 2’s. To make matters worse, these faded uniforms looked very similar to what Kirk and his crew wore. Star Trek: The Motion PictureThis film’s pastel pajamas are widely considered some of the worst uniform designs in the franchise.

Star Trek: Discovery Season 4 attempted to correct this terrible design, replacing the monotony of the previous season with bold, colorful costumes. That’s a good idea on paper, but in practice, the new uniform designs look like what you’d get if you ordered them The original series Fashion from Timo.

It’s hard to take any of these characters seriously when the open hood under their jackets makes them look like a white-collar boss who felt feral enough to unbutton his shirt and unbutton the bottoms to celebrate Casual Friday in style.

No, Captain, Captain

The next Star Trek costume failure is partly the fault of the most famous Star Trek actor alive: Patrick Stewart. When Paramount lured him back PicardHe was adamant that he didn’t want to wear a Starfleet uniform, which is why his character and the Season 1 crew were running around in dark clothes that Stewart might have stolen from the set of a David Lynch film. Sand dunes. This is a big part of the reason why seasons one and two are so painful to watch: on top of the writing, it’s just terrible enemy Looking like a masterpiece, the costume design of our series regulars is lazy and completely connected.

Starfleet’s uniforms were a little better than Picard’s crew, but not by much: they alternated between looking like updated TNG Academy uniforms and uniforms that looked like they were simpler than the ones being worn. Basement floors. By season three, everyone was wearing leather jackets with some slight Star Trek themes.

This is why we come back TNG Crew to look (embarrassingly enough) like bikers from an AARP-themed motorcycle club. It was as if the producers were too afraid that this would look or sound like an actual Star Trek show, which is crazy for a revival of the expensive show that once and for all brought the franchise back to life.

These students failed Fashion 101

The latest culprit on the Star Trek fashion front is Starfleet Academya show that can’t decide exactly what it wants its heroes to look like. Sometimes, coaches like Jett Reno wear uniforms that resemble a colorful hourglass that is randomly placed on a large area of ​​black fabric.

The Doctor is wearing something that looks like a monochromatic version of himself Voyager The outfit, and Holly Hunter’s advisor is wearing something like a brutal maroon jacket with no flair. At the War College, Commander Nelric is wearing something that looks like someone tried to draw it Battlestar Galactica Replaying Blues duty from memory after being hit in the head.

Incredibly, the students’ uniforms are stylistically sparse: they mostly walk around campus in drab gray uniforms that look like a worse version of what everyone else was wearing. Star Trek: Discovery Season 3. Sometimes, they break it down to wear only tight red shirts and black pants (which they accessorize with futuristic tactical vests for exciting laser tag games). Speaking of laser tag, after winning one game against the military college, they were wearing letterman jackets, which makes me wonder if anyone on the writing staff actually played sports in school.

None of these designs are great (except for the inexplicably comfortable Starfleet Academy hoodie), and many of them are downright ugly. This ugliness is made worse by the sheer visual chaos of the characters having more wardrobe changes per episode than most cosplayers do all year. This is symbolic Starfleet AcademyThe show’s biggest problem: It tries to do too many different things at once, and ultimately loses its own identity in the frantic rush to please fans of every era.

Clothes make a spaceman

Believe it or not, this barely scratches the surface of what makes the NuTrek so ugly. I couldn’t access the forgotten ship designs (quick, draw Starfleet Academy An educational ship from memory, I dare you!) and lazy outer space effects that make battles increasingly difficult to follow. These battles alternate between being visually boring (such as the battle of the binary stars in… discovery) to pathetic laziness (such as Riker’s threat to the Romulans in Picard With a whole fleet of copy and paste ships). After spending over $8 million per episode, NuTrek gives us space battles with less variety and excitement than those found in the NuTrek series. Deep Space Nine I did in the 90s.

The biggest problem remains the clothing, which has gotten worse since then discovery It first aired nearly a decade ago. Star Trek is a franchise with over half a century of amazing costume designs The next generation This is proof that Paramount once upon a time knew how to modernize the designs that were made The original series In the phenomenon of popular culture. If NuTrek’s creators are completely incapable of making these shows look decent, they’ll have no one to blame but themselves when audiences stop watching altogether.